Saturday, August 26, 2006

It's An Animal's Life

OK, I'LL BE HIS FRIEND BUT I DON'T HAVE TO LIKE IT!

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from email
I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not better for it.

-Abe Lincoln
Chinese Proverb

When someone shares something of value with you and you benefit from it, you have a moral obligation to share it with others.
Something to Think About

How Long Do We Have?

About the time our original 13 states adopted their new constitution, Alexander Tyler, a Scottish history professor at the University of Edinburgh, had this to say about the fall of the Athenian Republic some 2,000 years prior: "A democracy is always temporary in nature; it simply cannot exist as a permanent form of government. A democracy will continue to exist up until the time that voters discover they can vote themselves generous gifts from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the public treasury, with the result that every democracy will finally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, which is always followed by a dictatorship. "The average age of the worlds greatest civilizations from the beginning of history, has been about 200 years. During those 200 years, these nations always progressed through the following sequence:


1. From bondage to spiritual faith;
2. From spiritual faith to great courage;
3. From courage to liberty;
4. From liberty to abundance;
5. From abundance to complacency;
6. From complacency to apathy;
7. From apathy to dependence;
8. From dependence back into bondage.

Professor Joseph Olson of Hamline University School of Law, St. Paul, Minnesota, points out some interesting facts concerning the 2000 Presidential election:

1. Population of counties won by: Gore: 127 million; Bush: 143 million;
2. Square miles of land won by: Gore: 580,000; Bush: 2,427,000;
3. States won by: Gore: 19 Bush: 29
4. Murder rate per 100,000 residents in counties won by: Gore: 13.2 Bush: 2.1

Professor Olson adds: "In aggregate, the map of the territory Bush won was mostly the land owned by the tax-paying citizens of this great country. Gore's territory mostly encompassed those citizens living in government-owned tenements living off government welfare. Olson believes the United States is now somewhere between the "complacency & apathy" phase of Professor Tyler's definition of democracy, with some 40 percent of the nation's population already having reached the "governmental dependency" phase.

Nothing Better Than Friendship

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from email

Friday, August 25, 2006

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.

-Unknown

Middle Age

The only two things we do with greater frequency in middle age are urinate and attend funerals.

The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.

To err is human, to forgive - highly unlikely.

Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have millions of old ladies running around with tattoos and pierced navels? (Now that's scary!)

Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than a Kia.

After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching somewhere...you may be dead.

The Laws of Life

Law of the Theater

At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.

- Franklin P. Jones
Send the ACLU a Christmas Card!

Print this out and pin it to your bulletin board to remind you!!

I know it is a little early, but put them on your Christmas list. Have some fun and do something really worthwhile too! Wanna have some fun this CHRISTMAS? Send the ACLU a CHRISTMAS CARD! As they are working so very hard to get rid of the CHRISTMAS part of this holiday, we should all send them a nice, CHRISTIAN, card to brighten up their dark, sad, little world. Make sure it says "Merry Christmas" on it. Here's the Address, just don't be rude or crude.

ACLU 125 Broad Street 18th Floor New York, NY 10004

Two tons of Christmas cards would freeze their operations because they wouldn't know if any were regular mail containing contributions.. So spend 39 cents and tell the ACLU to leave Christmas alone. Also tell them that there is no such thing as a Holiday Tree. It's a Christmas Tree even in the fields!!

Pass this on to your email lists. We really want to communicate with the ACLU! They really DESERVE us!!
SCIENTIFIC STUDY

A South American scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with very low intelligence read their emails with their hand on the mouse.

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

The Laws of Life

Law of Biomechanics

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Wednesday Words of Wisdom

I have a degree in Liberal Arts;

Do you want fries with that?
We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.

- M. Acklam
The Laws of Life

Law of the Result

When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.

- Sigmund Freud
These People Vote

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him,"The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week."

He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?"

Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" .

. . . . . .He ALSO votes!
Letter to the Editor on Immigration

I did not check this out with Snopes. I don't know whether or not this letter is real or not, I really don't care. It expresses my opinion and what I believe the majority of Americans feel.

From: "David LaBonte"

My wife, Rosemary, wrote a wonderful letter to the editor of the OC Register which, of course, was not printed. So, I decided to "print" it myself by sending it out on the Internet. Pass it along if you feel so inclined.

Dave LaBonte (signed)

Written in response to a series of letters to the editor in the Orange County Register:

Dear Editor: So many letter writers have based their arguments on how this land is made up of immigrants. Ernie Lujan for one, suggests we should tear down the Statute of Liberty because the people now in question aren't being treated the same as those who passed through Ellis Island and other ports of entry.

Maybe we should turn to our history books and point out to people like Mr. Lujan why today's American is not willing to accept this new kind of immigrant any longer.

Back in 1900 when there was a rush from all areas of Europe to come to the United States, people had to get off a ship and stand in a long line in New York and be documented. Some would even get down on their hands and knees and kiss the ground. They made a pledge to uphold the laws and support their new country in good and bad times. They made learning English a primary rule in their new American households and some even changed their names to blend in with their new home.

They had waved good bye to their birth place to give their children a new life and did everything in their power to help their children assimilate into one culture. Nothing was handed to them. No free lunches, no welfare, no labor laws to protect them.

All they had were the skills and craftsmanship they had brought with them to trade for a future of prosperity. Most of their children came of age when World War II broke out. My father fought along side men whose parents had come straight over from Germany, Italy, France and Japan. None of these 1st generation Americans ever gave any thought about what country their parents had come from.

They were Americans fighting Hitler, Mussolini and the Emperor of Japan. They were defending the United States of America as one people. When we liberated France, no one in those villages were looking for the French-American or the German American or the Irish-American. The people of France saw only Americans.

And we carried one flag that represented one country. Not one of those immigrant sons would have thought about picking up another country's flag and waving it to represent who they were. It would have been a disgrace to their parents who had sacrificed so much to be here These immigrants truly knew what it meant to be an American. They stirred the melting pot into one red, white and blue bowl.

And here we are in 2006 with a new kind of immigrant who wants the same rights and privileges. Only they want to achieve it by playing with a different set of rules, one that includes the entitlement card and a guarantee of being faithful to their mother country. I'm sorry, that's not what being an American is all about. I believe that the immigrants who landed on Ellis Island in the early 1900s deserve better than that for all the toil, hard work and sacrifice in raising future generations to create a land that has become a beacon for those legally searching for a better life.

I think they would be appalled that they are being used as an example by those waving foreign country flags. And for that suggestion about taking down the Statute ofLiberty, it happens to mean a lot to the citizens who are voting on the immigration bill. I wouldn't start talking about dismantling the United States just yet.

(signed) Rosemary LaBonte

Monday, August 21, 2006

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

- Rita Rudner
One saggy boob said to the other saggy boob: "If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts."
The Laws of Life

Law of the Bath

When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

The Funeral Service

As a young minister, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a graveside service for a homeless man, with no family or friends, who had died while traveling through the area. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery way back in the country, and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost; and did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the crew, eating lunch, but the hearse was nowhere in sight. I apologized to the workers for my tardiness, and stepped to the side of the open grave, where I saw the vault lid already in place. I assured the workers I would not hold them long, that this was the proper thing to do.

The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch. I poured out my heart and soul. As I preached, the workers began to say "Amen," "Praise the Lord," and "Glory," I preached, and I preached, like I'd never preached before: from Genesis all the way to Revelations.I closed the lengthy service with a prayer and walked to my car. I felt I had done my duty for the homeless man and that the crew would leave with a renewed sense of purpose and dedication, in spite of my tardiness.

As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, "I ain't never seen anything like this before . . . and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.

- Josh Billings
THE BLOOD

One night in a church service a young woman felt the tug of God at herheart. She responded to God's call and found Jesus as her Lord and Savior.

The young woman had a very rough past, involving alcohol, drugs, and prostitution. But, the change in her was evident. As time went on she became a faithful member of the church. She eventually became involved in the ministry, teaching young children.

It was not very long until this faithful young woman had caught the eye and heart of the pastor's son. The relationship grew and they began to make wedding plans. This is when the problems began.

You see, about one half of the church did not think that a woman with a past such as hers was suitable for a pastor's son. The church began to argue and fight about the matter. So they decided to have a meeting.

As the people made their arguments and tensions increased, the meeting was getting completely out of hand. The young woman became very upset about all the things being brought up about her past. As she began to cry the pastor's son stood to speak. He could not bear the pain it was causing his wife to be.

He began to speak and his statement was this: "My fiancée's past is not what is on trial here. What you are questioning is the ability of the blood of Jesus to wash away sin. Today you have put the blood of Jesus on trial. So, does it wash away sin or not?"

The whole church began to weep as they realized that they had been slandering the blood of the Lord Jesus Christ. Too often, even as Christians, we bring up the past and use it as a weapon against our brothers and sisters. Forgiveness is a very foundational part of the Gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ.

If the blood of Jesus does not cleanse the other person completely then it cannot cleanse us completely. If that is the case, then we are all in a lot of trouble. What can wash away my sins? Nothing but the blood of Jesus!

End of case!!!!

"Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and He shall sustain thee. He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved." Psalm 55:23

This prayer is powerful and prayer is one of the best gifts we receive. There is no cost but a lot of rewards, let's continue to pray for one another. Here is the prayer:

"Father, I ask you to bless my friends, relatives and Internet buddies reading this right now. Show them a new revelation of your love and power. Holy Spirit, I ask you to minister to their spirit at this very moment. Where there is pain, give them your peace and mercy. Where there is self-doubt, release a renewed confidence through your grace.

In Jesus' precious name. Amen"